Day 3: The Cup Half Full

Dante's vision of Leah and Rachel, 1855

Genesis 29:32-35

New Living Translation (NLT)

³² So Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben,^[a] for she said, “TheLord has noticed my misery, and now my husband will love me.”³³ She soon became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She named him Simeon,^[b]for she said, “The Lord heard that I was unloved and has given me another son.”³⁴ Then she became pregnant a third time and gave birth to another son. She named him Levi,^[c] for she said, “Surely this time my husband will feel affection for me, since I have given him three sons!”³⁵ Once again Leah became pregnant and gave birth to another son. She named him Judah,^[d] for she said, “Now I will praise the Lord!” And then she stopped having children.

I am so grateful that today's reading was the story of Jacob. I can never tire of reading about his life. I had a great deal of worry on my breakfast plate this morning, and had my reading been anything other than the story of Jacob, I may have been unable to focus. As it is, I am just now getting around to blogging about it.

There's so much in the story of Jacob I could post about. The amazing way God works to bring things into His will even when we act out of his will, (the deception regarding his brother's blessing), the unfairness of being suckered into marrying Rachel's sister first. Perhaps even more, the story of the mandrakes, and how Leah "purchased" Jacob for the night. Can you imagine how poor Jacob must have felt, coming home from the field, tired and dirty, only to see one of his wives running up to him telling him he had to perform sexual favors for her that night because she had bought him with some mandrakes?  And to think, people often think women were treated as chattel back then. Men weren't always treated any better!

But I decided to write about Leah's attitude, instead. Not the demanding attitude after the mandrakes, but the attitude of unfailing hope. She wasn't loved by Jacob. I suspect he resented her for more than one reason... He never wanted to marry her in the first place, then she's the one that keeps having kids, while the wife he loves is barren. Year after year, Leah kept giving birth to sons. And with each new bouncing baby boy, Leah came up with a name that expressed hope that this new child would be what would make her husband finally love her.

Of course, it never worked. He was good to her, but it was out of duty, not out of love. Still, she never gave up. And her hope wasn't placed in her son, it was always placed in God. Each new baby was a blessing from God, a gift to bring her joy, and a hope of loving affection.

As sad as it is, I have to admire her for that constant hope. She never gave up.

Day 2: Duping The King

Genesis 20:2-3

New Living Translation (NLT)

² Abraham introduced his wife, Sarah, by saying, “She is my sister.” So King Abimelech of Gerar sent for Sarah and had her brought to him at his palace.

³ But that night God came to Abimelech in a dream and told him, “You are a dead man, for that woman you have taken is already married!”

Genesis 26:5-10

New Living Translation (NLT)

Artist Raphael, circa 1518

⁵ I will do this because Abraham listened to me and obeyed all my requirements, commands, decrees, and instructions.” ⁶ So Isaac stayed in Gerar.
⁷ When the men who lived there asked Isaac about his wife, Rebekah, he said, “She is my sister.” He was afraid to say, “She is my wife.” He thought, “They will kill me to get her, because she is so beautiful.”⁸ But some time later, Abimelech, king of the Philistines, looked out his window and saw Isaac caressing Rebekah.

In a way, i gotta feel sorry for poor King Abimelech. And I have to shake my head in wonder at Abraham and Isaac! Two generations in a line of very godly men having a moment, so completely lacking in trust, that they would take their lives out of God's capable hands and tell such a whopping lie to save their own skins.

I have to feel sorriest for the wives... Imagine being told by your husband that you have to pretend not to be married, knowing full well that you are likely to be taken in marriage by someone else! That very nearly happened with Sarah.

Fortunately, God was watching over them in spite of their stupidity. But God was pretty harsh with Abimelech, even though he never consummated the relationship with Sarah. I wonder then, if 50 or 60 years later, he ever made the connection between Isaac and his father, when Isaac told the same lie?

It's a mighty gracious God we serve, who is willing to forgive our stupidity and watch over us even when we take matters into our own hands. We don't usually get a glimpse into how far reaching our sin can be, and how it impacts others. We see it here, though. Because of the lie told to him, Abimelech's whole household was destined to come to an end. God had struck all the women barren. If Abimelech hadn't restored her to Abraham, that would have been the last we heard of him... and it would have been through no fault of his own. No intentional fault, anyway. 

Day 1: Innocence Lost

The first year I did this, i used the s.o.a.p. format to journal through. not this year. i'm going to be a little less structured in my note taking, and just write about what really stood out to me each day. of course, i may not always post an entry, because sometimes life gets in the way. this really is very time consuming. my typical routine is to wake up, turn on some praise and worship music on pandora and spend about 30 minutes waking up to God's grace, and then delve into the day's reading. you might ask how much reading that is every day, and the answer is roughly 12 pages. the official schedule is exactly 12, but i don't like stopping mid-chapter, so i tend to read on through a little further. if i don't stop to eat in the middle, it takes about an hour. there may be days that i will split the reading into a morning and evening portion. after i read, if time permits, i write my notes while it's still fresh in my mind.

Art by Wolfgang Sauber, used with permission

so let's get to it, shall we? i always read from my NKJV Bible, but i will often quote from other versions, such as below, i'm using the NLV for my notes. 

today i read the first 16 chapters of genesis. here's what struck me most...

Genesis 3:4-5, 16

New Living Translation (NLT)

4 “You won’t die!” the serpent replied to the woman. 5 “God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil.”

New Living Translation (NLT)

16 Then [God] said to the woman,

“I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy,    and in pain you will give birth.And you will desire to control your husband,    but he will rule over you.[a]”

Genesis 4:7, 13

New Living Translation (NLT)

7 You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.”

13 Cain replied to the Lord, “My punishment[a] is too great for me to bear!

The loss of innocense always begins with temptation. in eden, the serpant came and taunted eve, enticing her to eat of the fruit that God had forbidden to them. once she caved in and ate, (and sharing with adam), their spiritual eyes were opened and they were able to see right and wrong. as part of God's reaction to their disobedience, God told eve that she would from then on try to control her husband... but that the husband should rule over her. and in a godly marriage, that's still true today. the head of the house should be the husband... but oh, how we wives tend to want to be in control.

later, after eve's sons gave offerings to the Lord, cain got angry because his offering wasn't good enough. why was that? probably because cain only 'gave an offering of the fruits" and abel gave an offering of the first of the fruits. my guess is that cain gave God what was left over after he'd used what he wanted for other purposes. God doesn't like leftovers. 

so God asks cain why he's so glum, and reminds him that we're always going to be tempted. sin is always going to be there to taunt us, and to try and control us, but that we have to stand up and kick sin in the teeth and rule over our sinful nature. 

i added verse 13 just because it was the first biblical example of whining about the consequences. cain's response to God was pretty much "that's not fair!" of course it's fair! you screwed up... what do you want, a medal? how often do people break the laws and then want to lay the blame elsewhere. they don't want to face the punishment for their actions. they'll blame it on someone else, or on a crappy childhood even. but ya know, it doesn't matter how crappy our childhood is. we have choices. and when we make right choices, we sure do want the credit for making them! it's only fair that when we make wrong choices, we own them, too, no matter how hard the lesson is.

Day 4: Genesis 41-50

Joseph Forgives His Brothers

Scripture: Genesis 50:15-21 (New King James Version)

Joseph Reassures His Brothers

15 When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, “Perhaps Joseph will hate us, and may actually repay us for all the evil which we did to him.” 16 So they sent messengers to Joseph, saying, “Before your father died he commanded, saying, 17 ‘Thus you shall say to Joseph: “I beg you, please forgive the trespass of your brothers and their sin; for they did evil to you.”’ Now, please, forgive the trespass of the servants of the God of your father.” And Joseph wept when they spoke to him.
18 Then his brothers also went and fell down before his face, and they said, “Behold, we are your servants.”
19 Joseph said to them, “Do not be afraid, for am I in the place of God? 20 But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. 21 Now therefore, do not be afraid; I will provide for you and your little ones.” And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.

Observation:

joseph's brothers had good reason to be concerned. they pretty much deserved whatever was coming to them, at least from my point of view. but from a godly perspective, this is what total forgiveness is all about. joseph had never, not for one moment, forgotten the cruelty of his brothers, but his forgiveness was so complete, that it was his desire to help them, to provide for them, when they were down and out.

Application: 

when people have hurt me deeply, it takes a while for the healing to take place, sometimes even after the forgiveness has already happened. joseph had many years for those wounds to heal, and when his brothers came before him, those wounds opened back up, and he wept, on more than one occasion. (why does the word "wept" sound more palatable and masculine when talking about a guy? if it had been a woman, she'd have just cried!)

but even though those emotions still needed to be expressed, God was faithful to bring about total forgiveness and complete healing from the past. i've been in joseph's shoes! hard to imagine that all these thousands of years later, i could actually experience the same thing that one of the biblical patriarchs experienced. am i in a place now where, if it were necessary, could i be so gracious to those who have hurt me in my lifetime? 

yes, i believe so. i can't think of anyone off the top of my head whom i would even hesitate to help, no matter what the history was.

prayer:

Father, i thank you for all the times you have heard me cry out, and have healed my broken heart. sometimes forgiveness comes a little slow on my end, and it takes a lot of work to allow you to forgive through me, and in the future, Lord, i hope you will help me to get my pride out of the way a little quicker! there is such freedom in forgiveness!

Day 3 Genesis 29-40

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scripture:

Genesis 39:20-24 (New King James Version)

Joseph interpreting dreams in prison

20 Then Joseph’s master took him and put him into the prison, a place where the king’s prisoners were confined. And he was there in the prison. 21 But the LORD was with Joseph and showed him mercy, and He gave him favor in the sight of the keeper of the prison. 22 And the keeper of the prison committed to Joseph’s hand all the prisoners who were in the prison; whatever they did there, it was his doing. 23 The keeper of the prison did not look into anything that was under Joseph’s authority,[a] because the LORD was with him; and whatever he did, the LORD made it prosper.

observation:

being poorly treated, spitefully entrapped, and wrongly imprisoned seems to have been a recurring theme in joseph's life. but instead of letting that make him bitter, joseph submitted himself to God in spite of his circumstances, and as a result, God gave joseph what some would call a "midas touch".

application:

i wonder if joseph ever, even for a moment or two, allowed himself to indulge in anger towards the spiteful snots that caused him so much trouble? did he ever feel hatred towards his brothers for having thrown him first in a pit, then selling him into slavery? did he ever want to call potiphar's wife a hateful name after she lied and had him thrown in prison? i'll admit, it's a struggle for me not to write a hateful name about her, and i didn't even live back then!

but there's a big lesson i should learn from joseph's life. and in my head, i already know this! nothing good comes out of being angry. when you allow yourself to get consumed by emotion, that's all you can see... yourself. you sure can't see God through the haze of fury. you can't accomplish anything to make your situation better if you're ticked off all the time.

why do i forget that so often?

when we get out of our own pity party and turn our eyes back to Jesus, our sorrow can turn to joy. or even if it doesn't turn exactly into joy, it can sure seem brighter than the doom and gloom we feel when we're mad. and when we focus on doing our best for Him, in spite of our circumstances, it doesn't go unnoticed! He starts pouring out His blessings on us.

prayer:

Lord, i get awfully self-centered a lot. i frequently remind myself that i'm working for your glory, not my own paycheck... and that i should be doing it without complaint and certainly without being a bad witness. and most of the time, when i remind myself of that, i start doing a much better job! but that doesn't seem to apply to me when i'm at home. i don't do my best for you right here where it counts. i'm not always a good witness to my husband, or to our housemate. and the stuff that needs to be done around here, i tend to do half-way. i need some improvement in those areas, Lord. i know i do. but... i'm not going to ask right this moment for you to teach me how to improve! i'm just going to stop for a minute and say thanks that i HAVE a husband, and a beautiful home. you really have blessed me. for what, i'm not sure, but i am thankful. and i'm going to try to show a little more appreciation to you for what you've given me.

Day 2: Gen 17-28

Scripture: 
Genesis 22:9-17 (New King James Version)

Rembrandt's depiction of the sacrifice 

9 Then they came to the place of which God had told him. And Abraham built an altar there and placed the wood in order; and he bound Isaac his son and laid him on the altar, upon the wood. 10 And Abraham stretched out his hand and took the knife to slay his son.
11 But the Angel of the LORD called to him from heaven and said, “Abraham, Abraham!”
So he said, “Here I am.”
12 And He said, “Do not lay your hand on the lad, or do anything to him; for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.”
13 Then Abraham lifted his eyes and looked, and there behind him was a ram caught in a thicket by its horns. So Abraham went and took the ram, and offered it up for a burnt offering instead of his son. 14 And Abraham called the name of the place, The-LORD-Will-Provide;[a] as it is said to this day, “In the Mount of the LORD it shall be provided.”

15 Then the Angel of the LORD called to Abraham a second time out of heaven, 16 and said: “By Myself I have sworn, says the LORD, because you have done this thing, and have not withheld your son, your only son— 17 blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply your descendants as the stars of the heaven and as the sand which is on the seashore; and your descendants shall possess the gate of their enemies.

Observation: 
what strikes me about this passage is two-fold... not only is abraham 100%, unwavering in his obedience to the Lord, but he has raised his son to be equally as obedient, even when asked to do the most unimaginable thing!

Application:
This passage has always, my entire life, troubled me. what if i were in abraham's shoes? could i have trusted God enough to provide an alternative and spare me from what He asked? would i be so obedient as to strap my child down on an alter and raise a knife above her chest? (and have i raised my daughters to be so trusting and obedient? no, my kids would have knocked me six ways to sideways and taken off for the hills.)

i'd like to think that i could say yes, i'd be so obedient, and so faithful. heck, i'd like to even use the excuse that "nobody really knows what they would do in that situation, we just have to thank God that He would never ask such a thing of us". i remember my mom used to say something similar when i'd ask about being totally obedient to God in certain circumstances.

but i'm without excuse. i KNOW the answer. i would not be so obedient. i'd be bawling and screaming and throwing a major temper tantrum before the Lord and in the end i'd tell him forget it, find someone else. my obedience would have gone only so far as to get to the destination and build an altar. and then i'd have sat there. and sat. and sat. but not in my wildest dreams can i imagine being so obedient that i would be willing to put my child on that altar. i would not have the kind of faith that God would stay my hand and provide a suitable offering at the last minute. 

i would fail the test.

Prayer:
God, i can't even begin to say how sorry i am that i'm so stubborn, and that my faith and trust in you is so shaky at times. i guess i don't get any brownie points for honesty, but God, i can tell you this much... i'm extremely thankful that your grace and mercy cover my weaknesses. and i do really want to become more trusting, more faithful, and more obedient to you! teach me to trust you more, Father, but please, let my tests be a little less gut-wrenching than abraham's was.

Day 1 Gen 1-16

Sarah listening to Abraham & the Angel by Provoost.

Scripture: 
Genesis 15:2-3 (New King James Version)

2 But Abram said, “Lord GOD, what will You give me, seeing I go childless, and the heir of my house is Eliezer of Damascus?” 3 Then Abram said, “Look, You have given me no offspring; indeed one born in my house is my heir!” 

Observation:
when God makes promises, He doesn't just make empty ones. abram, in his impatience and frustration, got a bit attitudinal with God.


Application:
boy, how i can relate to that! how many times does God promise things, and yet we (i) get impatient and skeptical, and start whining about it? i could cite about a thousand examples of things i've questioned God's sincerity about. and it's not that i don't believe Him, i DO! i absolutely believe in His promises. the attitude comes from not knowing the "how" and the "when" that follows His promise. kinda reminds me of the sermons that were given at family camp.... "why, God?"

here, i'll cite a "fictional" example that entered my mind while watching a movie last night. (the book of eli). God had promised eli that if he would carry the last bible to the west coast, He would remove all obstacles and protect him, and His Word. at one point in the movie, it appeared that God failed to protect eli at all, and i found myself getting mad, thinking "hey God, but you promised!" of course, as the movie progressed, i realized that God had not failed eli at all, and that no matter how dire the circumstances appear, He is ALWAYS going to keep His promises. sometimes in the most unexpected ways.



Prayer:
Father, i know that i can count on your promises. and i also know that i have a tendency to get impatient and try to "help" you do your job... and all that does is delay things even further while you fix the damage i do when i get in your way. Forgive me for being so arrogant as to think that you could ever need my help, and teach me (gently, Lord) that the most important thing i can "do" to help you is to keep my mouth shut, my temper in check, and pray, pray, pray.